Thought over this one with my mind a long time, been dom in mindset but with submissive fantasys. Everyone's unique, I think self esteem only comes into it if you use fantasys to make your self feel better rather than just for fun. I've known selfish subs and dom in years online ie (one's who only talk to get you to rp and then not speak after. It's just a matter of the inderviguial more that what kind of person they are.