My computer is gay when it won't do what I want

My car is a nigger when it won't speed up enough

My front door is a bint when the lock is stiff

My stereo is fuckingwellfrench when the source selector dial is being finicky

My wife is a dyke when she's telling me that she's having problems with tuning the tv in.

However I'm not xenophobic, not racist, not sexist and I'm certainly not homophobic. I dunno I think it's just something I do. It's all about context. I don't actually mean something is gay as in "oh this situation is bad, just like those homosexuals"... it's just words I use.