I am not sure what I am doing really - it felt the right thing to do and I feel a lot happier now than I was this time last week. It may wear off if the job search gets more difficult but I guess I'll see what happens. Instinct is important - gut instinct is very rarely wrong but doubts often cloud that. It's odd - what is the relationship between doubts and instinct? Does pure instinct exist? If we let that guide us, isn't it reducing human cognition to its basest form, a form that cannot really exist in the real world, a world that we have made so complicated for ourselves?
I have always tried to think of others when I come to my decisions. In fact I probably think of others too much. Like you, I don't really care too much about my own life and the world around me, but I express this in caring for others. It's a weird one.
Apathy? I don't think I am apathetic, probably the other way really. I have spent my life fighting my inherent laziness and I have succeeded, largely. The fear is though just slipping back into my own apathy. This scares me as if it was up to me, I would do nothing. But then this doesn't satiate my brain so I need to do something. But then I'd rather be lazy and do nothing. It's a constant paradoxical battle.
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timeasmymeasure
Re: *hugs*
Date: 2009-12-14 10:53 pm (UTC)I have always tried to think of others when I come to my decisions. In fact I probably think of others too much. Like you, I don't really care too much about my own life and the world around me, but I express this in caring for others. It's a weird one.
Apathy? I don't think I am apathetic, probably the other way really. I have spent my life fighting my inherent laziness and I have succeeded, largely. The fear is though just slipping back into my own apathy. This scares me as if it was up to me, I would do nothing. But then this doesn't satiate my brain so I need to do something. But then I'd rather be lazy and do nothing. It's a constant paradoxical battle.