It's The Hairs Which Put Me Off
Oct. 1st, 2010 12:20 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lupestripeWolfie's eating Pork Scratchings. They have bits of hair on them. The thought makes me queasy. My stomach has never been strong. I have had this condition for eight years. Should probably see a doctor but he'll just say I am fat.
I have a cold. It surely is a flaw of human design that such things affect your ability to breathe - it's a fundamental of being, surely. Why can't viruses affect your bowels more, or your tummy? Why is it always your sinuses meaning you need to nip to the toilet every 10 minutes at work in order to blow your nose. I am sure my colleagues think I am incontinent or something. Sucking on Strepsils all week - been a lifesaver if I was being honest. Snotting all over my trousers too - my collegues probably love me. Guinness works well for colds too - been drinking one a night in the hope of getting the iron fortification I need. Tonight I drank three because I like the sauce.
There's a new advert around from the Keep Britain Tidy people. It says "Sadly there is no such thing as the dog poo fairy". Probably true but I'd like to see the job description if there was. I would keep Britain tidy by cutting off Cornwall and Norfolk. That's just me though. And God do we need a dog poo fairy here. Or someone who harvests dog shit for the sake of a sexual fetish. That'll do. The streets round here need clearing up. Does anyone have a dog poo fetish here? Fancy coming round? There's a path I can point you to.
The buses have been messing me around this week too. The X11 has gone back into First Leeds control rather than First Bradford meaning the bus on Tuesday didn't turn up, Wednesday's just sat in a bus stop for 20 minutes whilst the driver had a break screwing the rest of us and I didn't even bother today. What with other buses being cancelled or turning up late, I am close to becoming one of those moaners who writes off to companies to complain about poor service. Sadly, the UK roads are not fit for purpose - they are too small and too covered in potholes - meaning that delays are almost inevitable. I empathise - just not after a hard day at work. I had a massive strop in front of everyone at the bus stop on Tuesday. I needed to be home for an important engagement. I flounced off. Probably not my finest hour.
I am getting into some new music too - bought the second album from Finnish children's metal band Hevisaurus (who are a real metal group dressed as dinosaurs made out of reindeer pelt) whilst I have discovered German rap-metals Herzer just lerking on my computer. Brilliant.
Sunday was a quiet day - I worked from home as Wolfie had to study. I cooked a lamb shank though with all the trimmings followed by out-of-date apple pie (40p from Sainsbury's - a steal) and custard. Sadly, I couldn't open the can and had to push the metal lid into the container, forcing custard to spurt all over my cooker. It was like a clown orgasming over a custard pie. Not good. The meal went down well though. I do miss cooking but now Wolfie and I have vowed to eat more healthily, we are hoping to cook more stir-fries and different cuisine. That's the plan anyway.
Diet starts on Monday after my cold is over. I have been procrastinating for three years if I was being honest.
I have a cold. It surely is a flaw of human design that such things affect your ability to breathe - it's a fundamental of being, surely. Why can't viruses affect your bowels more, or your tummy? Why is it always your sinuses meaning you need to nip to the toilet every 10 minutes at work in order to blow your nose. I am sure my colleagues think I am incontinent or something. Sucking on Strepsils all week - been a lifesaver if I was being honest. Snotting all over my trousers too - my collegues probably love me. Guinness works well for colds too - been drinking one a night in the hope of getting the iron fortification I need. Tonight I drank three because I like the sauce.
There's a new advert around from the Keep Britain Tidy people. It says "Sadly there is no such thing as the dog poo fairy". Probably true but I'd like to see the job description if there was. I would keep Britain tidy by cutting off Cornwall and Norfolk. That's just me though. And God do we need a dog poo fairy here. Or someone who harvests dog shit for the sake of a sexual fetish. That'll do. The streets round here need clearing up. Does anyone have a dog poo fetish here? Fancy coming round? There's a path I can point you to.
The buses have been messing me around this week too. The X11 has gone back into First Leeds control rather than First Bradford meaning the bus on Tuesday didn't turn up, Wednesday's just sat in a bus stop for 20 minutes whilst the driver had a break screwing the rest of us and I didn't even bother today. What with other buses being cancelled or turning up late, I am close to becoming one of those moaners who writes off to companies to complain about poor service. Sadly, the UK roads are not fit for purpose - they are too small and too covered in potholes - meaning that delays are almost inevitable. I empathise - just not after a hard day at work. I had a massive strop in front of everyone at the bus stop on Tuesday. I needed to be home for an important engagement. I flounced off. Probably not my finest hour.
I am getting into some new music too - bought the second album from Finnish children's metal band Hevisaurus (who are a real metal group dressed as dinosaurs made out of reindeer pelt) whilst I have discovered German rap-metals Herzer just lerking on my computer. Brilliant.
Sunday was a quiet day - I worked from home as Wolfie had to study. I cooked a lamb shank though with all the trimmings followed by out-of-date apple pie (40p from Sainsbury's - a steal) and custard. Sadly, I couldn't open the can and had to push the metal lid into the container, forcing custard to spurt all over my cooker. It was like a clown orgasming over a custard pie. Not good. The meal went down well though. I do miss cooking but now Wolfie and I have vowed to eat more healthily, we are hoping to cook more stir-fries and different cuisine. That's the plan anyway.
Diet starts on Monday after my cold is over. I have been procrastinating for three years if I was being honest.
